Monkey has her very first Ballet class today! That's right. Juliard, here we come! I am going to be the beaming, retarded father in the corner snapping pictures the ENTIRE time I am there. She has a little leotard, and dance shoes, and she has to have her hair pulled up (which I'm worried about). I can't do hair very well. I have managed a few times to get perfectly straight pigtails, or a pseudo-braid.... but we'll see. I think I'm gonna have to go to CVS and pick up some of those hair clip things that look like a plastic claw. I have little ones but they will not do the trick.
I will be posting pictures of her first class...
OH! This morning.
We seriously need to talk about this.
I was driving down the Durham Freeway coming to work this morning. The wind is blowing. The rain is coming down hard. I am in the left lane driving with traffic, but giving a few extra car lengths to the car in front of me so I don't make them nervous when this PRICK in a BMW gets right on my ass and starts flashing his lights. Number one rule, don't do that. You will be forced to avoid slamming into me when I hit the brakes. This pisses him off. So he jerks to the other lane and pulls up next to me (we are doing about 60 mph) and he stares, so I feel obliged to give him the finger and stare at him while I do it. This does not make him happy, so he speeds up and attempts to cut me off, but in doing so, he hydroplanes into a spin and crashes his car into the median, completely ruining the entire front and side of his car! Serves you right, asshole.
Yes, I did pull over and ask him if he was ok, if he had a cell phone, did he need me to call someone, did he need me to wait on him...
but only after calling him an idiot did I ask these things.
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